


a little too not over you

by mostlikelydefinentlymad



Category: Boy Meets World
Genre: Boy Meets World - Freeform, Childhood Sweethearts, Don't Have to Know Canon, First Kiss, Idiots in Love, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Not Canon Compliant, POV cory matthews, POV shawn hunter, Post-Canon, jealous shawn hunter, not GMW compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-03-15
Packaged: 2018-05-26 20:55:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6255478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mostlikelydefinentlymad/pseuds/mostlikelydefinentlymad
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>its been two years since cory & topanga's divorce and cory is finally ready to give dating a shot but shawn isn't too thrilled about the idea.</p>
            </blockquote>





	a little too not over you

**Author's Note:**

> tell me why you're so hard to forget  
> don't remind me, I'm not over it  
> tell me why I can't seem to face the truth  
> I'm just a little too not over you

 

"Her name is Julia, not _her._ I don't understand why you're so upset, Shawn."

Two years ago Shawn had woke to the sound of knocking at his door and opened it to find his arms full of a sobbing mess of a best friend. A part of him had felt a stab of satisfaction that Cory and Topanga had called it quits for the last time.

He'd held Cory together throughout meetings with his lawyer and paperwork, had sacrificed sick days at work just so Cory wouldn't be alone and sniffling over made-for-tv movies by himself. He'd given Cory Matthews everything he had to give.

Up until two weeks ago it had been enough and Shawn should've known it couldn't last forever.

-

Her name was Julia and she was stunning - 5'7 with loose auburn curls and eyes that would make an artist grab his charcoal and canvas with one look at her and Shawn hated her.

It wasn't that she was a horrible person or treated Shawn like he was the outsider when it was the other way around.

If anything, she smiled too much (which caused tiny dimples to take shape on her cheeks) and didn't seem to mind the fact that Cory passed out on _Shawn's_ shoulder on the nights he insisted on renting a movie at _their_ place rather than hers. Or the fact that he and Shawn shared clothes more often than not.

She was perfect for his best friend and he hated her because Cory didn't.

 

"Me? Upset? No, everything's fine," Shawn snapped as he rescued a plate from a sink full of sudsy water and slid it alongside the others in the cabinet. It clattered loudly and Cory flinched for half a second before putting his hands on his hips.

"You're lying to me, Shawn Hunter. Was Julia mean to you? If she was you just say one word and she's gone," Cory replied as he tugged Shawn's hands out of the water and spun him around. Water formed tiny canals on the linoleum and Shawn would really like to join them right about now.

"Julia made me realize that we maybe need some time apart," he stated.

Cory's face twisted as if Shawn had said he never wanted to see him again - "Don't you think you're being a little dramatic?"

"I booked you a hotel room for the next couple of days."

Granted, the hotel was less than two miles away but it was the notion itself that spoke louder than words ever could.

 

Cory gaped.

"Is this about Thursday? Because she apologized for that & she didn't- You know what? _No_. If this really is what you want, I'll walk out the door. I won't even fight you."

Shawn crossed his arms and lifted his chin - the last thing he wanted was to drive a wedge between them but something had to give.

The brunette got as far as the front door and paused with his hand on the knob before turning around - "This is the part where you ask me to stay."

That in itself was the problem and the solution. Either way, Shawn wouldn't be able to sleep at night.

Upon seeing that he wasn't going to change his mind, Cory huffed and slammed the door behind him. No one could ever accuse Shawn of being the dramatic one in their friendship, Cory held that title all on his own.

He fell asleep with the phone in his hand, waiting for a call that didn't come.

*

 

Shawn woke to the sound of pounding on the door and glanced at the alarm clock - 5:15 a.m. For Christsake, the sun wasn't even up yet.

"You could've used your key ya'know," he mumbled as he shuffled to the door.

The door creaked as he drew it back and found Cory standing on the welcome mat they'd purchased together. There was a partially wilted and broken bouquet of flowers in his hands and raindrops slid off of his jacket onto the floor.

 

"These, umm, these are for you," he said as he held them out - a peace offering, a truce.

"Thanks."

"I lost my key," Cory lied. The outline in the right pocket of his jeans gave him away but Shawn decided to let him have this; he was never a good liar anyway.

"Are you gonna come in or drip all over the mat?," Shawn asked as he opened the door further and stepped aside, flowers in hand.

Cory closed the door behind him and slid out of his jacket - "Does this mean I can come back home?"

It was too early for this nonsense and Shawn's filter wasn't the best when he was half asleep. His default mode when drowsy and irritated leaned heavily on being passive aggressive.

"How's Julia?"

Cory shoved his hands in his pockets in the way that he always did when he was feeling uncomfortable in his own skin - "We broke up."

 

Shawn was a lousy friend and he was beginning to sense a pattern; every time a girl got too close to either of them she'd split before things got serious or when she'd had enough of Shawn's presence in Cory's life.

Maybe he had it right the first time around; they needed space.

"Sorry to hear that," he lied as he hit the power button on the coffee pot and yawned.

"--four days ago," Cory added.

And wasn't that confusing. Why hadn't his own best friend confided in him?

"You didn't tell me," he stated.

"How could I have, Shawn? We've been at each others throats since I met her."

Shawn hadn't intended on being so transparent in his jealousy, his pettiness. But he hadn't been able to stop the slow trickle of two years and half a lifetime of loving Cory Matthews in silence from spilling out onto every corner of the life they'd carved out together.

He deserved to be someone's first choice but no matter how many dates he went on (not many these days) he couldn't commit to them, found himself glancing at his watch and counting down the hours until he could go home and watch terrible outdated science fiction movies with Cory.

That wasn't the kind of foundation to build a relationship upon.

"You don't belong with her," Shawn stated - it was the truth.

Cory Matthews was supposed to marry Topanga, they were supposed to have two kids and a dog.

Shawn was supposed to be the fun uncle who traveled and brought back souvenirs, who spun tales of far away cities and people he'd met along the way.

He was going to be a background character in their story, the minor protagonist who was a walking tragedy but managed to pull himself together enough to find someone else to spend his life with.

Not...this.

 

" _What_?"

"You heard me. You should be with Topanga."

Cory groaned and buried his face in his hands - "Not this again, we're not doing this."

"Why not, Cor? Wasn't she good enough for you?"

Wasn't _I_ good enough for you?

"I thought this was about Julia."

"It was...it is," Shawn fumbled.

Cory was frustrated.

He hadn't slept since Shawn had kicked him out and he was tired of his best friend yelling at him over things he had no control over, details Shawn had never been privy to.

Irreconcilable differences, that was the reason stated for the divorce but Cory and Topanga both knew the real reason was sitting in the corner of the room with one leg crossed over the other, attempting to pass as someone who was merely doing a crossword puzzle and lending support when needed.

They hadn't argued about Shawn, not really. He was simply _there_ even when he wasn't.

 

" _No_ it's _not_ ," Cory retorted.

 

Shawn's hair was messy from sleeping and somehow he'd managed to put his shirt on inside out before nabbing Cory's sweats before opening the door.

He usually slept in nothing but his boxers and had a habit of trudging through the house in them in the early morning hours (this gave Cory very conflicting feelings when he first moved in) but today he'd grabbed the first clothes he could find if someone (see: Cory Matthews or a scorned Juli) showed up on their doorstep.

Cory wanted to wake up to that everyday of his life. It wasn't a startling realization if he were honest with himself.

 

And regarding Julia? They hadn't even been serious about one another. Truth be told, he'd spent many hours telling her about the pranks he and Shawn had pulled in school.

About the Valentine's Day they spent together when Topanga was out of town with her folks. They'd eaten pizza rolls and marathon watched horror flicks (Shawn's idea) instead of the usual chocolate and romantic comedies. It was the best Valentine's Day he'd ever had.

Julia, in turn, had told him about her own best friend.

Her name was Anne Isabella, named after Lord Byron's wife because her mother was a fan of his poetry. They'd known one another since they were children. Anne was currently stuck in an unhappy marriage and Julia was her shoulder to cry on. It was a miserable situation for both of them.

It was then, from the outside looking in, that Cory realized (and berated himself for being such an idiot) he and Shawn were that couple. That they had _been_ that couple for decades.

He'd been so caught up in passing as your average heterosexual boy next door who absolutely was _not_ in love with his best friend that he'd missed the obvious - _it wasn't one sided._

He'd found an ally in Julia and they'd parted on good terms with the promise to keep in touch.

 

Last night he'd called her from the hotel at two a.m. when he didn't know what to do with himself, didn't know how or if he could fix the rift between he and Shawn before things got worse.

She'd told him that this was his life, to give it a happy ending and he'd ended up here.

"Then what's it really about?," Shawn shot back as he deposited the flowers into a cup of water. He busied himself with arranging them this way and that, avoiding Cory's gaze.

"What its always been about, Shawn. You and me."

"You've lost me, explain."

The irony of those words wasn't lost on Cory. He _had_ lost Shawn, more than once and that was enough for a lifetime.

"Why don't you tell me what's really bothering you, Shawnie," Cory replied as he moved aside the flowers. He put a hand on Shawn's shoulder to make him look up. Maybe then he'd understand.

"It's too early to be psychoanalyzed, Cor. Can we drop this please? I'd like to get some sleep before the sun comes up."

"I never did anything with Julia," Cory confessed.

They'd kissed and it was incredible but Cory felt like he was cheating on Shawn. And wasn't that a riot? They weren't even a couple...were they?

It hadn't progressed from there.

 

"Why not? She seemed to like you."

Cory cleared his throat and began to pace, this wasn't as easy as he thought it'd be.

"Mr. Feeny once told me that every choice we make in our lives means something. I...chose you. I _choose_ you."

 

Shawn took a step back and gripped the counter - "What? Why?"

 

"I don't know if you've noticed or not but I've _been_ choosing you since we were kids, Shawnie."

Even when Shawn's girlfriend had forbidden them to see one another they'd found a way.

Even when they'd attempted to replace one another with other people and again in college when Cory had branched out on his own and found himself floundering.

Every decision they'd ever made regarding one another had led to this moment and it wasn't a question of _if_ , it was a question of _when._

Shawn smiled bashfully and looked away.

 

"And that's why you can't be trusted with decisions about your future," he said cheekily.

Cory moved closer. "Julia wasn't my future."

Typical, so typical, Shawn misunderstood the declaration. He crossed his arms, eyes softening.

"Listen Cor, I know no one can even come close to comparing to Topanga but you should get out there. I was an idiot and you shouldn't listen to me, Julia is a nice girl. She'll never be Topanga but...you could maybe give her a shot."

This was an out if Cory wanted it, he could agree and play along or he could build a future that he could actually see himself in. He chose the latter.

 

"I don't want Topanga. I'll always love her but that's behind us now and I don't want Julia either. I want....

I want to take you to see the leaves change in Vermont and watch the snow fall in Colorado. I want to make you hot cocoa in the Winter (I still have that watch by the way) when your hands get cold. 

I want to take you to Phillies games so you can complain the whole time."

Shawn bit his lip and shook his head - "I don't do that."

Cory took another bold step closer. "Yeah. You do."

 

"What're you trying to say, Cor?"

 

"I'm saying Mr. Feeny was right and I've made a lot of wrong turns when it comes to you. I'd like to make it up to you if you'll let me."

Shawn remained frozen in place, hands clutching the counter top behind him, bottom lip caught between his teeth. He looked as nervous as Cory felt.

" _So?_ " Cory asked. They were nearly chest to chest but it wasn't enough. 

 

"Okay," Shawn murmured. It came out as little more than a whisper.

 

Cory closed the space between them. He tilted Shawn's face up with his fingertips and gently brushed their noses together.

"Choose me," Cory whispered.

"Already did," Shawn murmured. His hand came to rest on the small of Cory's back and the other clasped his best friend's.

"Prove it."

 

The minute their lips touched Cory knew he'd found what he'd been looking for all along. Shawn had always been his and he'd been Shawn's, both thinking the other couldn't possibly feel the same. They'd wasted so much time.

Shawn leaned into the kiss and pulled Cory against him, his lower back dug into the counter top but he didn't care.

He tilted his head and deepened the kiss until it was the good side of dirty. Cory gripped his hips through his sweatpants, desperately clinging as if his life depended upon it.

 

Shawn came up for air and slid his hands under Cory's t-shirt, now wrinkled and slightly damp from the rain and sleeping in it last night. "You could've saved us a lot of grief and kissed me years ago."

Cory arched under his touch and leaned his forehead against sharp collarbones. "You said it yourself, Shawn. Just because you want something to happen it doesn't mean it will." 

"Don't listen to me," Shawn mumbled as he pressed kisses on the top of Cory's ear, the curve of his neck - any skin he could reach at the moment.

 "Trust me, I won't." Cory gave him his classic _Lets be reckless_ grin. "Unless you wanna join me on the couch," he added. 

"Do you even have to ask?"

* * *

 

It had taken them more than half of their lives but they'd finally found their happy ending.

* * *

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> fic title (and lyrics in the notes) comes from a song by david archuleta  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cffe00_YJ4s
> 
> I realize this is a tiny fandom (I don't care for GMW but that's just my preference) so I really appreciate it if you read this fic and I love you for it, little reader <3
> 
> btw Cory's date is totally in love with her best friend if you didn't catch that and she's doing the same thing Cory is doing: distracting herself from what she really wants because she thinks she can't have it


End file.
